the south

>   Alabama:
>
>The owner of a golf course in Alabama was confused about paying an
>invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He
>called her into his office and said, "You graduated from The University of
>Alabama and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%,
>how much would you take off?" The secretary thought a moment, and then
>replied, "Everything but my earrings." You gotta love those Alabama
>women.
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>Kentucky
>
>A group of Kentucky friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for
>the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under
>the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked.."
>Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the
>trail," the successful hunter rep lied. "You left Henry laying out there
>and carried the deer back?" they inquired. " A tough call," nodded the
>hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
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>Louisiana:
>
>A senior at Louisiana University was overheard saying... "When the end of
>the world
>comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked why, he replied he'd rather
>be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than
>in the rest of the civilized world.
>
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>Mississippi:
>
>The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his
>buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"
>Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man answered, "I
>couldn't tell, but I got the license number."
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>Tennessee:
>
>A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper
>asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
>
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>
>
>A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
>road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and
>one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the
>scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He
>asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat
>tire."
>The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded,
>"When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in
>the back. I never did understand it neither."
>
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>You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone
>retiring and moving North.