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My First Condom |
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BigAl4604
.375 Holland & Holland Magnum
Joined: 22 January 2009 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 572 |
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Topic: My First CondomPosted: 18 May 2011 at 05:24 |
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My First Condom
I recall my first time with a condom. I was 16. I went in to buy a packet of condoms at Parchen's pharmacy. In those days it took a lot of guts to go in a store and ask for that kind of item because everyone in town knew me and there was no doubt the young lady (I think her name was Delores) knew what they were for.
She was working as an assistant behind the counter, and she could see that I was really embarrassed by the whole procedure. She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I honestly answered, 'No, not really.'
So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure
I apparently still looked confused. So, she looked all around the store to see if it were empty. It was. 'Just a minute,' she said, and walked to the door and locked it. Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside. 'Do these excite you?' She asked.
Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was stand there with my mouth open and nod my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on. As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk. 'Well, come on', she said, 'We don't have much time.'
So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful that, unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW, I was done within a few moments.
She looked at me with a bit of a frown. 'Did you put that condom on?' she asked. I said, 'sure did,' and held up my thumb to show her.
She then beat the shit out of me....
Women have always been hard for me to figure out.
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"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." -Benjamin Franklin, 1759 |
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CB900F
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Honor, Integrity Joined: 10 June 2003 Location: Eritrea Status: Offline Points: 8857 |
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Posted: 18 May 2011 at 05:39 |
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Fella's; Now that there's an oldie but a goodie, fer sure, fer sure.
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Birth certificate!? He don't need no steenkink birth certificate!!
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Irish Bird Dog
.416 Rigby
Too many Joined: 01 March 2009 Location: Midwest Status: Offline Points: 5574 |
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Posted: 18 May 2011 at 07:26 |
![]() good humor....like when we were young...............so long ago.....
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Irish Bird Dog
NRA Life/Endowment 2nd Amendment Supporter |
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jh45gun
.416 Rigby
Joined: 06 December 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1695 |
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Posted: 19 May 2011 at 07:33 |
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Yep a classic
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In times of tyranny and injustice when law oppresses the people, the outlaw takes his place in history
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Kingpin
.416 Rigby
aka Old IronSides Joined: 01 July 2003 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 11716 |
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Posted: 21 May 2011 at 15:23 |
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So who's old?...............................Kingpin
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There are times when a normal man must, spit in his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
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Dennis Keith
.416 Rigby
Joined: 09 September 2006 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1468 |
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Posted: 23 May 2011 at 09:14 |
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I think my Birth Certificate was on papyrus.
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BigAl4604
.375 Holland & Holland Magnum
Joined: 22 January 2009 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 572 |
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Posted: 13 June 2011 at 09:04 |
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Dennis, if yours was on papyrus then there are some here who must have their's scratched on a cave wall somewhere.....
Edited by BigAl4604 |
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"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." -Benjamin Franklin, 1759 |
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Posted: 13 June 2011 at 09:34 |
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I'm young....I never hear it before...great one
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